Job Opportunity

Application for position: “Death Panelist”
Job description: Will decide which members of society are to be killed.

Name: __________________
DOB: __/__/__

Questions:

You believe that Sarah Palin is:
a) a genius
b) too cerebral
c) America’s savior from liberal socialist Nazi fascist communists (who are probably also gay)

Your preferred source of news is:
a) Fox News
b) Fox News
c) Fox News

Do you believe the Earth is:
a) flat
b) round
c) other (please explain ____________________)

A “living will” is:
a) what animates zombies
b) a contract which legally compels a person to die
c) a document in which the signer states wishes regarding medical treatment in the event that he or she becomes mentally incapacitated.

Barak Obama Will Murder Your Grandma

Actual image of Obama Death Panel

Actual image of Obama "Death Panel"

And then he’s going to kill her.

Barak Obama hates the elderly, and now he is in a position to do something about it. Sarah Palin, our savior from the liberal, gay, socialistic, Nazi, fascist, communists has used her keen intellect to discern the evil plan being sold to us under the guise of “health care reform.”

No politician in history has ever before taken on the formidable over 55 voting block by trying to kill them off.  This must be the audacity he was talking about!

Ok, now the details:

The Death Panels are mandated to occur every 5 years — or less is one is elderly or ill. They will involve a panel consisting of 1) a government doctor, 2) someone to hold you down, and 3) an executioner. The “counselling” will take place at the top of a large building, yet to be constructed, called the Tower of the Sun (liberal architect Joe Teotihuacán is rumored to have been commissioned to design it).

The elderly and infirm will line up at the bottom of the steps and slowly proceed upwards, eventually to be judged worthy or not of continued life. As they ascend, rivers of blood from the unworthy will spill past on both sides in “blood channels” cut into the steps (the blood eventually drains into the reflecting pool in front of the Washington monument).

The “living will counselling” (a.k.a.  euthanasia) is performed by using a sharp rock to split open the chest cavity. Then, the still beating heart is removed and held up toward the sun, so that the president may take a bite out of it.

This is change you can believe in?